Urban Shamanism

My Work, my Rules

Last week, I went to a friend's house to drink Jurema (mimosa tenuiflora) for the first time. Jurema is an sacred medicine from Brazil that's similar to Ayahuasca but more liquid and quite bitter; also unlike Ayahuasca, it requires another plant to promote the natural DMT in the body to flow, Syrian Rue (peganum harmala) in my case that night. I also smoked tobacco and drank binam, a herbal liquor made by the Inga people in Putumayo, Colombia. Overall, it was an interesting experience and the medicine felt gentle, even though the process was quite physical. The other fascinating aspect of this meeting was the conversation: I'd never been to a ceremony with an ancestral plant like this one, where I spent the whole night talking with someone. I must admit I would've liked to remain silent for a moment and rest a bit, but my friend was very eager to share. I felt that he needed to speak, so I did my best to interact with him while also observing the codes in his words.

I went to this meeting with three clear intentions: increasing my Discipline, my Humility and my Respect. I've been feeling the prompts of my Purpose leading me ever deeper and I know that the influence I've been training comes at a price. Reaching greater numbers of people brings a risk of enormous Hubris which I simply can't allow myself. The moment I start thinking of myself as a teacher or guide to others is the moment I start to deviate from my Purpose, and that applies to everyone particularly in spiritual paths. My friend was a great help in this regard because he not only revealed his own pride and prejudice, but also confirmed and deepened observations that I'd made about other people I've met in the context of ancestral ceremonies. He gave me all of the warning signs, then proposed that I accompany him in organizing ceremonies. I agreed to consider it but I was pretty sure that I didn't want to do that. I know I could learn a lot if I agreed, but I just don't feel the calling to engage with shamanic work in that way and, most importantly, I don't think of the medicines as he or others do, I see them as one of many tools, and not my focus at all.

This week, I asked my friend Rebeca in Argentina to make a reading for me, intended to provide a general idea of where I'm at regarding my Service, my Sexuality and my Social Life, with the proposal about the ceremonies as a separate investigation. The general reading was really awesome and helped me through a moment of doubt that I was having right then and there, but when we got to the ceremonies, the message sprung with enormous clarity before me. There's too much drama in the world of medicinal ceremonies right now, at least in my country, with powerful and territorial shamans making pacts and imposing their own rules on how to serve. The organizers of ceremonies (including my friend) all have their issues among each other, their confrontations and differences. That's not an environment that I want to get involved in or even observe.

Today, I woke up from a dream where I was invited to take cacao as medicine, and I felt the presence of almost all the Orishas of Yoruba around me, especially Shango and Eleggua. A dog appeared out of nowhere and bit my leg with enormous fury, but the owner laughed and I laughed as well. The dream was calm, but the message therein was just as clear as it was in the cards, namely that this invitation isn't aligned with my Purpose at least for the time being. Before I was offered these visions, I saw the Tiger, my strongest Spirit Animal, as a colossal being before me whose paws were as big as me. I wasn't awed, much less fearful, I welcomed the vision with joy. I felt that the dream was giving me two paths to follow and I know precisely which one I want for myself.

I have my own tools, my own Service. My Purpose has been clear to me for years and I've expanded enormously while following it. What I've learned, I've learned because I've chosen to and every time I see a restriction disallowing me to perform my duties as I see fit, I walk away. I love medicinal plants, I've had great experiences with them, but I attend ceremonies when I'm called, not because it's my responsibility. If I were to join a team to organize ceremonies, I'd have to put aside my own conditions and practices for the sake of others, which isn't wrong in itself, but after what I've seen and heard in those spaces, I don't feel it works for me. Perhaps later I'll harness the opportunity to offer my service in those contexts, but right now, I love what I'm accomplishing on my own.

Night Rune: Tiwaz

I receive an honor that grants me access to a new space. I see and feel figures of great power. A dog warns me about a medicine.

Daylight Rune: Isa

You find an important frontier in your process. Cold indicates to you the place where the energy is stagnant, increase your movement, summon greater hear to your body and your space. Embrace, caress and kiss, offer and receive warmth. Say also what you must say, establish healthy limits in your surroundings, speak with certainty, overcome the fear of showing your Truth. Identify the values that are non-negotiable to you, do not give out the slightest sign that you might yield them for any price. The labors and duties of others do not belong to you, you have your own guiding thread, follow your path without deviations. Observe your habits, the conditionings that compel you; many do not work for you, but others are crucial for your evolution. Not every restriction is a prison.